The Day The Pigeon Went Bizirk...It Was Just Another Day At Work

When I typed the post title I was humming the chorus to Ray Stevens' "Mississippi Squirrel" song.
If ya'll don't know this song...well...I feel sad for ya :(

If that's the case and you've never heard it then click on this link-

http://music.yahoo.com/ray-stevens/videos/view/mississippi-squirrel-revival--2147722
 or if it's been awhile and you'd like to listen to it again, then by all means!

Okay, so the title obviously gives it away...somewhat....but it did get your attention, right? :)

I have a fear of large birds...

RUN...Run away tiny man!!!

Okay, so maybe that's not real...doesn't matter if it was...Actually that's not true...I would NEVER go outside...EVER!
If you just got a sick feelin to the pit of yer stomach when you saw that pic then you have an idea of what kinda FREAK'N OUT I do if a large bird gets near me......like say...a goose!  Now I know...you're think'n what does a pigeon have to do with large birds??? Wait for it...

I work in the same building I did 10 years ago but at that time I worked on the top floor. Now I'm in the basement- with no windows! Yes, this is a small town. Under 3,000 people. So when I say "top floor" don't get too excited! The building was built in 1930-something and it has a basement, main floor and 2nd floor- yes...that's the top!
Anyhoo....
I worked in a clerical position in an office with three other ladies. One of which I had became good friend with. Let's call her "K"...:)
She was always composed and very professional. She has four kids and I always loved to hear her stories from home (it's nice to know you're not the only one with crazy kid stories:)

Anyway, like I said, the building was built in the early thirties and the windows do not have screens, nor is the building very efficient when it comes to heating and cooling. Nothing has changed in 10 yrs!
On really nice days we would open our window to catch a breeze.

One afternoon we were all busy at work, typing away....on typewriters....yeah, people still actually use them! Point being, we were busy, when all of a sudden....I hear a loud, but muffled sort of drumming sound coming from behind me- (all of our desks were positioned with our backs to the window) so bout the time it took my brain to identify the sound as wings, I saw it!
THE BIGGEST PIGEON I'VE EVER SEEN!!!

Okay, either that thing was on steriods!, or I REALLY under-estimated a pigeons size!
Of course I had only seen them on the tops of the buildings.
So.... now I'm seeing a pigeon up close...Okay.......they..are..HUGE!!!, and the wing span has also definitely been under-estimated!

We were all screaming at the site of this large flapping Sky Beast!!.......okay.........ME and "K" are screaming...the other two were acting normal. They, apparently, did not have the good sense to know when you should FREAK-OUT!!!-  this...was that time!!!
While the other two ladies quietly missed out on this opportunity, K and I were freak'n out enough for both of them....and maybe a few others.....
Did I tell you that our desks were exactly alike in size and shape?, and that K's desk was on the opposite side of the room??? Keep that in mind.

So, this massive bird is flying around the room hovering just above our heads, and the anxiety level is FULL THROTTLE!, or I thought it was....  Then, all of a sudden one of the other girls springs to action, running to the front of the office and SHUTS...THE...DOOR!!!!...... Nooooooo!!!!!!!!
Immediately K and I are screaming " Don't trap it IN here!!!!! Open it back up! Open it!!!"
We were answered with " We don't want it to get out into the hallway"........
YES!........yes we DO! was what I was think'n but hey, I'm selfish that way ;)

While we were screaming to not shut the door- simultaneously I had begun to slide off my chair attempting to get under my desk but before I could manage that K came running, hunkering-down, with hands covering her head and pushed me under my desk and crawled under it with me!!!!....????...now, remember that I told you her desk was the same size????And....across the room???  She panicked, OBVIOUSLY.
I was thinking "GET YOUR OWN DESK WOMAN!!".

It all happened so fast! During our scramble to squish ourselves under my desk- which...may I say...is NOT made for proper cover in case of over-head attacks- the dang bird just flies back out the window! UUGGGHHH!!! Right behind it, without miss'n a beat, one of the other girls shut the window as it flew out! Hallelujah!!!!!

Yes, relieved...but now fully committed under the desk! Time to pry yourself out and act like a grown-up...ahahahaha...
"WOW!!!", I said dusting the dirt off my clothes..."That was INSANE!!"
I looked at K who was now hysterically laughing- as was everyone else.
She apologized over and over for shoving me under my own desk. "I really don't know what I was thinking!" she said.

"I do!" I said..."You were just as scared of that stupid bird as I was!, and I think you were trying to get under my desk before I did to sacrifice me!!!"  Hahahahaaa, oh my gosh! we laughed so hard! We laughed the rest of the day!
But, we kept one eye on that window after that!

The Culprit.

SuzyQ